The Healing Power Of Forgiveness

 

For this week, I would like to talk about the healing power of forgiveness.

There is no person who goes through life unscathed. As if the events aren’t enough, there are people who hurt us, either knowingly or unknowingly. Some hurt physically, some emotionally but both ways, the pain is life-altering and shapes the future versions of ourselves.

While some move on and leave their hurts behind, many carry the impressions with them, often unaware. At some point or the other, the lingering hurt catches up with us and acts as triggers, often making us behave in ways that we would never normally do. 

And then there are those of us who cannot forgive ourselves for some kind of wrong we feel we did. I came across a sentence that has never made more sense than today where so many people are fighting mental demons. The toughest prison to break through is that of our own mind. How true is this! How difficult is it to forgive ourselves, to let go of guilt and regret and to live the free life that we truly deserve!

I have added a small ritual for my day – The Ritual Of Forgiveness. This follows the ritual of gratitude that I wrote about in my last blog. Once I am done with my dinner, I walk along the corridor of the floor where my flat is situated, soaking in the peace of the night. After a few minutes of walking, I start mentally listing the things I am grateful for. The next step is practicing forgiveness. I go through the events of the day and if anybody hurt me in any way, I mentally forgive them. Just repeating that I am forgiving them for my own peace of mind makes me feel much better. Then I think about any past hurts that I still suffer from, and I forgive those people. And lastly, I think about all the mistakes I did during the day or in my past, and I forgive myself. It is hardest to forgive myself but the reminder that I am not the same person anymore usually makes me feel better.

It is very essential to let go of hurts and to forgive people who might have wronged you in any way, more for your own sake than for theirs. You cannot live well by carrying the burden of anger, hatred, guilt or regret. Heavy lies the heart where these four reign! Forgiving others and yourself is the only way to live life lightly and in peace.

The question arises – how long do you need to practice forgiveness? Until we reach that stage where, when we think of that particular person who wronged us, and do not feel anything anymore. Until we feel only apathy for that person or event.  When we can look back on those people (and ourselves) and not feel any grudge, anger, hatred or remorse, we will have completely forgiven them. Till then, as many times as it is required, as many times as is possible for you, practice the ritual of forgiveness. More so for your own peace of mind, than theirs. You deserve to break free from the prison of your own mind and live freely.

For me, the walk at night has become a sacred rite – ritual of gratitude, followed by the ritual of forgiveness. There is one more ritual that I follow which completes the trilogy and lets me go to sleep with a calm mind. I will share about this ritual in the next blog. Till then, practice gratitude, forgive others and yourself and bring peace to your mind!